Chapter 1: A Sudden Pause in Life

Last week, my 7-year-old daughter was admitted to the hospital, interrupting our summer vacation and bringing our lives to an unexpected standstill.

It all began with sudden abdominal discomfort and a high fever that seemed to appear out of nowhere. While symptoms resembled a common stomach virus, my intuition told me it was something more serious. Following our GP's advice, we rushed to the ER, where blood tests revealed she was battling a severe infection.

Initially, the situation was unclear. An ultrasound ruled out an infected appendix, suggesting instead an inflamed colon. Unfortunately, as time passed, the infection spread to her appendix, necessitating surgery and an extended hospital stay.

While the experience was uncertain, it was never life-threatening, and she is expected to recover. With my world now confined to a 12-square-meter room, I found myself reflecting deeply, focusing on being present for my daughter during this challenging time.

This unexpected pause provided me with valuable insights into motherhood and the often-overlooked everyday moments that shape our lives.

Life's essence is found in the ordinary, in the moments we often take for granted.

The guilt that surprised me (not related to work)

Caring for my daughter consumed every moment. She was unwell, in pain, and required my assistance for even the simplest tasks. She needed my unwavering presence.

Motherly instinct kicks in, compelling us to prioritize what matters most. My professional responsibilities faded into the background, replaced by a surprising sense of calm.

I am a psychologist and coach, having transitioned from a career in law. My passion lies in helping others navigate their lives, not to fix them but to help them discover their true selves and areas for growth.

I derive immense satisfaction from coaching, creating new training programs, and engaging in public speaking. It is a privilege to support my clients on their transformative journeys.

When working with clients, my focus is entirely on them, yet a sense of guilt lingered. How could I offer clients my full attention while often failing to do the same for my children?

With three kids, each rarely receives my undivided attention, especially as they grow older. Life is full of interruptions—cooking, work, and sibling dynamics. Yet, in this moment with my daughter, every second felt precious.

This is the essence of life.

I provided her with water, assisted her to the bathroom, and stayed by her side at night, offering comfort through my presence and heartbeat as she dealt with her pain.

She often expressed her desire to go home, and though only seven, she understood her situation. I didn’t need to say anything; just holding her hand was enough.

Every moment, every interaction, and every observation can be an opportunity. Yet, we often overlook them, caught up in thoughts of the past and future, rarely pausing to appreciate the present. The present often feels like an afterthought—too fleeting to savor.

Soon, my children will be adults pursuing their own paths. But for now, their lives are here, within my reach. I strive to cherish every moment.

Chapter 2: The Trap of Achievement

Somewhere along the way, life has caught up with me once again.

Life crises, whether large or small, prompt us to pause and reassess what truly matters. Many of us spend our lives pursuing goals, constantly striving for more and rarely feeling satisfied with the present.

While the drive to achieve is essential for progress, especially in our fast-paced society, we have reached a point where the pressure can feel overwhelming.

Media and social platforms are inundated with tips on maximizing productivity, often leaving us feeling busier than ever. The word "busy" frequently arises in conversations with friends.

I, too, have been trapped in the relentless cycle of productivity. After experiencing a significant burnout a decade ago, I switched careers and learned to approach life with a more relaxed mindset, shifting my focus to the diverse experiences life has to offer.

Yet, as I sat in the blue chair, which I turned into a bed for the night beside my daughter, I recognized the beauty of focusing on what truly mattered without the distractions of work or other obligations.

We were not in a hurry; we were entirely present in that moment. It pains me to acknowledge how rare such experiences have become.

It's challenging to break free from societal expectations.

Last year, I met a business coach who left the high-pressure consulting world to pursue a more fulfilling life. Now, after nine years in her coaching practice, she thrives by taking regular breaks—one day off each week, a week off each month, and one month off each year.

She escaped the system.

I contemplated this notion. We can harness our drive to achieve in ways that support our well-being rather than overwhelm it.

It's time for me to reassess my goals, making gradual changes one step at a time.

Lessons from My Daughter

The most profound insights came not from my reflections but from my daughter, untouched by society's obsession with productivity. Despite her discomfort, what saddened her most was the inability to see her friend, with whom she had planned a grand reunion featuring a gathering of stuffed animals, each with its own unique stories.

When the pediatrician informed her she was well enough to go home, her face radiated pure joy:

"When I get home, I'm going to eat ice cream with Millie, my godfather."

Such is the simplicity of life.

Thank you for taking the time to read my story. I hope it resonates with you and encourages reflection on your own journey. Please feel free to share your thoughts or experiences in the comments or reach out directly.