I spent 31 days in Santa Barbara County Jail, a fact that might astonish those who know me today. The truth is, alcoholism is a deceptive and insidious illness.

In late 1998 and early 1999, I faced two DUI arrests. The court mandated that I participate in the Sherrif’s Work Alternative Program (SWAP), which involved community service at the local fairgrounds. However, I continued driving despite having my license suspended and was caught again, leading to the loss of my community service option. Consequently, I was required to serve the remainder of my sentence behind bars.

Recently, I began watching the acclaimed series “Orange Is The New Black” (OITNB). It seems I’ve joined the conversation a bit late, but I quickly realized how much I had overlooked. The series poignantly portrays the tragedies and injustices faced by incarcerated individuals, weaving in themes of activism alongside life lessons. The characters experience significant growth and transformation while navigating their time in prison.

What resonates with me is their interpersonal dynamics and the backstories that unfold throughout the series. I find myself curious about their lives prior to incarceration and how they confront their challenges, as I have had to do the same.

Piper Chapman, the protagonist, frequently reflects on her privileges and seeks to make amends for her past actions. I believe the next installment should feature Laverne Cox, my newfound favorite actress who portrays Sophia Burset. However, for now, I’ll focus on my own journey through incarceration.

The show triggered memories of my own past experiences in jail, allowing me to reflect on how those days shaped my growth.

Walking to Surrender

I recall the day I had to walk a couple of miles to turn myself in, carrying a small backpack that I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep. In my anxiety, I had worn makeup to hide my scars and felt insecure without it. I can't remember if I had a drink the night before, but I certainly felt nervous.

My time in the “drunk tank” wasn’t representative of the reality of jail life, as I was intoxicated and unaware of my surroundings. This time, however, I experienced the painfully long wait and the feeling of being ignored when I sought answers. I was confined to a small triangular room, waiting for my name to be called.

After an agonizing five-hour wait, I was subjected to a humiliating strip search in front of a female guard, which left me feeling demoralized. Eventually, I received my jail clothes, including shoes reminiscent of Vans. Piper’s commentary on her arrival in prison made me chuckle, as she, too, tried to cling to her previous life.

Unforeseen Realities

While jail may not be as severe as prison, it served as a harsh awakening for me. I had only spent one night in jail previously, but this time I would be there for 28 days—or even longer. Watching OITNB brought back the stark realities of my own experience.